Meandering Thoughts (#15)

Damn. My meals are telling me like it is.
Stuff is getting real. 

Tonight's post references several thoughts from last Sunday. If you need a refresher, here is a direct link. Please note, last week I paraphrased a quote from one of my favorite animations, Adventure Time. However, I failed to attribute it explicitly. So, I went back and edited it. Then I remembered that I had discussed this theme from the show before. If you are interested, you can find the actual quote beautifully presented, in an old entry. It connects perfectly with last week's conversation. 

Funny how that works.

Speaking of humor, the Universe, i.e., my local Chinese takeout, a month ago, provided me the above fortune. Again, I knew I had already blogged about my irrational view on fortune cookies, not too long ago. Well, I found it, and discovered another connection to tonight's theme. 

"Do it now! Today will be yesterday tomorrow."

That makes four intersecting posts!

Someone up there is having a good laugh.

For now, let us put aside my stupidity--there has been plenty of it on my part. Also, for the moment, let us ignore the fact that I do not like the words "stupid" or "stupidity", except when applying it to myself. It is a topic that I have been meaning to blog about. However, I am not ready for that discussion.  

(Yet, maybe that time draws nearer than I realize. After all, the search for this blog's purpose continues.) 

Last Sunday, after uploading my blog post, I actually sat down and made three lists. They were messy, jumbled, hard on the eyes, and incomplete. But, I went to bed having done it without judging myself. First thing the next morning, I read through those lists. They made me cringe. However, using them as a baseline, I made two new, easier to read, and better organized lists. And I continued the process through the week. Each iteration was better than the first. More importantly, so was my thought process about organizing my projects and goals.

Well, something happened on Tuesday (it would have occurred on Monday, but that is my designated grocery and food prep day). With one of these lists drawn up, I began working on an important project. It involved rearranging my garden beds. A lot of labor, designs, and supply runs to Lowe's were necessary. Its completion was a lynchpin to a multitude of other garden and yard projects. Time was running out to do it. This list, while not beautiful, motivated me. 

I am happy to say that by the weekend, all the complex steps, the ones that had weighed heavily on my mind, and had inspired me not to work on the project, were completed. In addition, having things explicitly spelled out, kept me from wasting time daydreaming about the process. Now, two setbacks forced me to stop. One was a rain delay, and the other, my middle-aged body. It takes me longer to recover from physical labor. But, I am okay with these obstacles. 

So, accepting that my initial steps at planning would ultimately suck, yet, plowing through it anyway, paid off. I am in a different mental state now when it comes to all these projects and goals. Already, I have created better designed lists, and the habit of reviewing them daily. More importantly, there is more time, as I am not wasting some of it on fantasizing about getting things done. 

Unfortunately, it is only the beginning, and half my life has passed. There is still some "sucking at this stuff" ahead of me. including sucking at remaining focused and motivated.

Since, "I have many miles to go before I sleep", there is an urgency to work better, and a necessity to prune my ambitions. All of which require skills and habits that I need to build. But better late then never, I guess.   

In the end, I was always a late bloomer.